How to Get the Respect You Think You Deserve

Well actually you don't get respect, you earn it.

Respect is earned by words, and by actions. Things like keeping your promises or proactively providing service. Things like becoming more personally involved with the success of your customer, or taking responsibility when responsibility is not really yours. It's the extra effort. It's the extra mile.

One of the keys to respect is the word personal. How personal are you in your actions? How personal are you in your communication? The more personal you are with others, the more respect you will earn.

But there is a secret to respect. The secret is: In order to earn the respect of others, you must first respect yourself.

This means you have to have confidence in yourself. You have to like what you do. You have to be willing to serve. You have to like yourself. And you have to love yourself. Like and love are two separate issues. You may like yourself for how you look, or how you sell, or how you communicate, but you love yourself for who you are, what you believe in, and what or who you seek to become.

Try writing a list of all the good things that you've done for yourself, and all the good things that you've done for others. Be real enough with yourself to admit what you like about yourself, and what you love about yourself.

Then list what you need to change about yourself that will make you better and stronger. Maybe your self-respect suffers from the way you see yourself in the mirror, or some of the personal choices that you make. Maybe it's your environment. But whatever it is, if you don't acknowledge it, you will never be able to change it or enhance it. You'll never be able to grow in earning respect from others until you grow in respecting yourself.

The secret is easy. Do the right thing all the time and respect will be yours. Say the right words, take the right actions, and believe in your heart that you're doing the best you can do -- for yourself first, and for others second.

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